My Loneliness..

We're all lonely for something... we don't know what we're lonely for.. How else to explain the curious feeling that goes around feeling like missing something in life which we've never even knew? I am myself alone. One oneness, a unit in a society, but always afraid, always alone.. the people whom you feel yours wont accept you as what you are and as their own.. the feeling is weird..

If I should scream, if I should call for help, would anyone hear... would it even matter? Time takes it all, whether you want it to or not. Time takes it all, time bears it away, and in the end there is only darkness. Sometimes we find others in that darkness, and sometimes we lose them there again.

These days I always get negative thoughts.. No matter how much I try to control them, they keep increasing. At least now I have realized that they increase if I try to control them. And now I am not sure whether I am trying to embrace them or exclude them.

I've been sitting here trying to find myself.. I get behind myself.. I need to rewind myself.. I'm digging my way to something better.. I'm sick and tired of being sick and tired... I used to go to bed so high and tensed.. I have lost the will to live. Simply nothing more to give.There is nothing more for me. Need the end to set me free. I thought I could leave, but couldn't get out the door

You'll just never know...so many emotions I choose not to show..

I don't know what I'm doing anymore. I don't know what I wanna see. My world use to be worth living for, and now it's hard enough just to be me. I'm screwing up every little good thing I ever try to do.

But I know you are always there for me.. standing besides me.. holding my hand in all the aspects.. You are the only hope for me now.. to come out of my loneliness and to find the way to reach my goal. Though god has given me the pain.. he has given you to overcome my loneliness, my pain.. Thanks for being with me in such a bad state of mine.

Purpose of life.. !!

The purpose of life is not to be miserable and make others miserable. Purpose of life is not to show-off to other people. Purpose of life is not to think on small terms for short term joy and little pleasures.

First make a list of what should not be the purpose of life. So you think about it and one day you will discover. When you discover you will say, ‘wow!’

I too wanted to discover the purpose of my life. When I listed .. I found so many.. which have to be done and which not to be done. I finally found something new apart from my existing things.. Hopefully will achieve it soon.. (Don't ask me what exactly I found those as purpose of my life.. because every one has their own goals.. their own things to do, in their own way).

You too try to discover the things..and find out the purpose of your life. :)

When people criticize you, you should just listen to them. If there is something good in it, take it and if there is nothing good then just leave it, ignore it. They can comment, so what! You should not lose your equanimity. I tried so hard to ignore the people who comments me.. but finally I could manage to do so.. Lets try.. and feel the change..

Getting Attached to someone is also painful.. !!

As the pain was more I tried to be in quiet.. heavens.. and sat in silence.. As I was attached to my dears... I could not concentrate on the nature...I could not stand in silence... As I said being far away from loved ones is more painful than the physical pain.. I experienced this..

Attachments takes away peace of mind.. Then you are in pieces and fall prey to misery. Before I get scattered too much, I need to gather myself and rid my breath of the feverishness through surrender.... I do not notice this until it is too late..

Without fighting the attachments, observe the feverishness for that... and go to the cool place of silence within. We have to direct the attachment to the knowledge not to the people... That is what I observed ..

Feeling that everything is stagnant in my life, I realize that everything is changing, yet see there is something that is on-changing. I recognize the non-changing among the change are the wisest of all.

It is very painful when the person whom we are attached to chooses to leave us..stay far away from us.. How do you feel then?? I could say one thing here.. Whatever is yours will always be yours. Whatever is not yours will come for a little while and then go. Wake up! Sitting and crying being emotional is not going to help. Wake up and see this is the world and the world has its own metrics. See how you can move forward. That is what I can say .. :)

Then you will say .. wow! Life is much more than I thought it was..

Pain is never permanent .. !!

The best remedy for those who are afraid, lonely or unhappy is to go outside, somewhere where they can be quiet, alone with the heavens, nature and God. Because only then does one feel that all is as it should be and that God wishes to see people happy, in the middle of the simple beauty of nature.

Pain is never permanent ..

A wise man once sat in the audience & cracked a joke. All laughed like crazy.. After a moment he cracked the same joke again and a little less people laughed this time. He cracked the same joke again & again, when there was no laughter in the crowd, he smiled and said,

“When u can’t laugh on the same joke again & again, then why do u keep crying over the same thing over and over again…”

‘Lets move on’… :) :) .. Pain is never permanent .. You google yourself to find which makes you feel better.. which makes you more happier.. which makes you more stronger enough to overcome your pain.

I am in search of that and trying to find out some remedies to overcome the pain .. as such mine is physical.. so going out alone with out my loved ones.. Don’t know whether this will reduce my pain or will increase as being me far away from my loved ones.. Seems being far from the loved ones is more painful than the physical pain..

Life is made of Sweet Lies !!

Life has never promised u anything...
Nor has god...
 
But people did... 
    Some said they wil never leave u...Lie..
    Some said they wil love u till death...Lie..
    Some said u are the most precious one...Lie..
 
Life is made of such sweet Lies...
All that matters is, how u faced the time when u finally realized those were just lies...
 
You may ask "wudn't life be much better without these lies?"
But the fact is , The times u lived on those big lies were the only times u truely lived... !!!

But that is not the life.. Life is something not about finding yourself in these lies..its all about creating yourself.. and Live for the moments which you can't put into words...

My Pain.. My Suffering...

Every pain and suffering is not permanent.. Pain is temporary. It may last a minute, or an hour, or a day, or a year, but eventually it will subside and something else will take its place. If I quit, however, it lasts forever. 

I want to be alone.. Being alone can be depressing.. If you let it.. I keep my aches and pains to myself.. I just listen and pray alot to keep me away from these aches and pains.. so that I can spend my time with my loved ones.. I can regularize my activities..

I couldn't even imagine how my loved ones are suffering because of me.. I don't want to give them my pain and suffering.. Hopefully everything will settle down soon..

I have a strong feeling that pain of mind is worse than pain of body. Probably I may be in this stage now.. I have to overcome the pain of mind.

Everything is important, and everything is unimportant. When you realize this fact, you have no more choices to make. That is why all these pains and aches are.. It might be important to your life, probably to bend you into better shape.. :)