Authority and love

Mistakes keep happening all the time. Often you get irritated by them and want to correct them. How much can you correct? There are two situations when you correct others’ mistakes: 

1. You correct someone’s mistake because it bothers you. But even if you correct it, this does not work. 

2. You correct someone’s mistake, not because it bothers you, but for their sake so that they can grow. 

To correct mistakes you need authority and love. Authority and love seem to be contradictory, but in reality they are not. Authority without love is stifling and does not work. Love without authority is shallow. A friend needs to have both authority and love but they need to be in the right combination. This can happen if you are totally dispassionate and centred. When you allow room for mistakes, you can be both authoritative and sweet. That is how, the right balance of both. People, when they are in love, exercise authority with each other. Authority and love exist in all relationships. 

One guy says, "The husband just loves and the wife has authority." 

the other guy asks, "Is that a mistake?" 

But I said, "I don’t want to correct it!" 

With whom do you feel really comfortable and at ease?

If someone doubts your love and you constantly have to prove it, this becomes a heavy load on your head. When someone doubts your love, they start questioning you and demanding explanations for all your actions. To explain everything you do is a burden. But your nature is to shed the burden, and so you don't feel comfortable. When you question the reason behind an action, you are asking for justice for yourself. You are creating a distance when you ask for justice. Your whole intention is to come close, but you are creating a distance. You are a witness to all your actions. You are as much a stranger to your own actions as you are to someone else's. You are the Eternal Witness. When someone asks for an explanation, they are speaking from doership and imposing that doership on you. This brings discomfort. If somebody is just there with you, like a part of you, they don't question you. They are like your arm. There is thorough understanding and questions don't arise. Neither demand an explanation nor give an explanation.

Ego & Self

Ego is identification with a small role that you play, any limited identity. Ego is – ‘I am something, I am intelligent, I am stupid, I like this, I don’t like that, I am rich, I am poor, I am ugly or I am beautiful, I am teacher, I am doctor, I am something, I am, that is ego. The identity or label you put on yourself is ego.

When you understand all this then you feel, “Is this the thing?” Do I exist only in the limited boundaries of the roles that I play? No! After understanding ego also, there is something left, what is this? That is the self.

How to be happy always?

Forget about always, then you are happy. In wanting to be comfortable always, one becomes lazy. In wanting perfection always, one becomes angry. In wanting to be rich always, one becomes greedy When we do not realize that only life is for always, then fear comes. All ways do not lead you, only one way leads you. If you remove always from your dictionary then everything is alright Drop "always" and all will be right - that is intelligence.

Ego And Self From A Different Angle

Ego is that something, which has two aspects – the positive and the negative.

The creativity in you – are the results of ego. At the same time, when you break down communication, when you isolate yourself, when you’re in tears, when you’re stressed – that is also ego. We do not know about the ego, and so we don’t pay much attention to it. But just 2-3 facts, awareness of how ego works !

The self – the basis of life! You can call it the spirit, the soul, consciousness, the source of the mind – anything. It is that something, which doesn’t change in one’s whole life. After discovering about all these levels, what is left is the Self.