Monday, October 12, 2015

Mom ..you are really Great !!!.

My life has been changing all the times.. as I already said getting attached to the loved ones is very painful.. I do not know what to say now.. Simply looking to get out of my feelings.. 

I thought My son is very stubborn and and he doesn't get attached very quickly.. But today I got to know that I was wrong in estimating him... he is more attached to my mom.. as I do attached to my mom. 

He has the same affection towards me and also towards my mom ... He asked my moms mobile number and wrote it on a piece of paper... and when she left to her native.. he hold that paper in his arms inside the quilt and slept with that.. and after some time he suddenly got up.. and was asking for my mom.. why she left him... Even I have the same question..   I want to be with my mom and dad always.. the same is happening with my son also now. He wants to be with my mom and dad always..apart from us..  

The love she is showing on us is speechless.. and want to change myself to be like my mom.. to pour the love on my son as my mom does.. Mom is always Mom.. and My mom is more that what mom usually is !!



Saturday, October 3, 2015

I am Just a Girl..

I love being called pretty. But I will never believe it.
I am not always right. But I hate admitting I am wrong.
I am almost always smiling. But its not always real.
I can be read like an open book. But I do hide so much.
I work hard at things. But I don't always get what I deserve. 

Now I got to know that we should not let the people who do so little for you , control so much of our feelings and emotions.

Though I am just a Girl...its my own life to live and to be loved.

We Just have one Life...

Why to complicate our precious Life?

Missing someone??            -  Call
Wanna meet up?                - Invite
Wanna be Understood?     - Explain
Have Questions?               - Ask
Don't like something?        - Say It
Like something?               - State It
Want something?              - Ask for It
Love Someone?               - Tell It

We just have one life. We have to keep it more simple.

In my life .. 

I have lived, 
I have loved, 
I have lost, 
I have missed, 
I have hurt, 
I have trusted, 
I have made mistakes.

But now I realized that  my attitude should be based on how others treat me. Else we cant survive. 
Its my life. I have to live and enjoy the most of it.
 
I got enemies..Good. This means I stood up for something in Life. I have few people in my life who doesn't like me as I have everything with me. I feel they are jealous on me. I used to cry a  lot when  they scold me for silly reasons. I realized later that they wanted to rule my life. But I stood up and haven't given any chance to them now. 

And Now Its My Life.

I thought I would share something with you..

These days I found some depression symptoms.After my symptoms getting worse and worse and the suicidal thoughts getting stronger and stronger, I decided to hospitalize myself as suggested by my doctor.

I was hospitalized couple of times, but this time when I enter into the department, I felt so embarrassed and weird. Being hospitalized was one of the scariest things I ever did, but looking back on it now, I believe it was really what I needed. I not only needed medication and a safe place, but I needed some intensive therapy, some ideas of ways to release some feelings, and I needed a chance to figure out what my next steps would be when I was released. My love supported me in all the ways he can.

I'm not saying it was easy..and I never want to do it again...but It's not an easy decision to make..

I feel There are two types of pain in this world.

Pain That Hurts You
Pain That Changes You

And Now the second one was applied for me.. Pain that changes me.. in all the ways And I have become little stronger enough to make things happen in a new direction.